1 down, 5 more to go

Yesterday I had my first chemotherapy session. I was extremely anxious and I am glad that both S. and my mom were with me the whole day. It must have been a long hard day for them too.
It was a long day, but not as bad as I had anticipated. I went in at 9am and only got home at 4.30pm. Later in the evening I started feeling a bit queasy and had a funny taste in my mouth but it could very well be just stress. It is a strange experience, knowing I will feel sick from the cure and not from the illness.
I am waiting for the side effects to kick, not knowing when and what, I am just waiting. Weird, very weird. I don’t feel like myself, I am tired, feel heavy, a bit nauseous, my cheeks are red and of course, I am anxious. I cannot stop thinking about the toxic drugs I have inside me and that are killing my good cells too.
I am having FEC-T chemotherapy which I understand it is quite heavy. It is divided in two parts, three sessions of FEC and three of T (the letters stand for the drugs’ names). To manage the side effects I have a bunch of medication to take and even an injection I have to give to myself tonight which will stimulate the bone marrow to produce more cells, boosting the blood count. Again, this has side effects that I have to manage with more medication. And I really hate to swallow pills. I have a diary of the medication I have to take at home, it is so long I am always afraid of taking the wrong ones at the wrong time. To help me S. numbered the boxes and does a brilliant job reminding of the times.
As the chemotherapy drugs may affect my heart, I had a heart scan before the session started. It is good to know my heart is working well, healthy and strong. I had also blood tests done and one hour before the treatment started I took anti-sickness drugs and started wearing the cold cap.
One of the drugs came in three huge syringes filled with a bright orange/red coloured liquid (I think it was the Epirubicin) which took more than one hour to administer through a cannula inserted into my left hand. The liquid is so corrosive that the nurse was wearing goggles, gloves, sleeves and an apron. Imagine what it does to my poor body! The nurse pushed the content of the syringes, slowly, through the cannula one syringe after the other. The other two drugs (Fluorouracil and Cyclophosphamide) were given through a drip. Not painful.
The room where the chemotherapy treatments are administered is very pleasant, with big windows, quiet and bright. Yesterday there were only three patients and it is funny how we all briefly exchange a sympathetic look.
During the treatment I had reflexology. I really can’t complain about the treatment I have been receiving so far. They do absolutely everything to ensure patients are comfortable.
This morning the nurse called me to know how I was feeling and if I had any questions. It is very reassuring to know I can really count on them.

Hair

In preparation for the chemotherapy, I’ve been cutting my hair from very long to shorter and shorter. It is quite short at the moment. Apparently, the shorter it is the better the chances of not losing it. Also, I’ve decided to try the “cold cap” which is a cap that helps cooling the scalp, restricting blood circulation during the treatment and reducing the risks of hair loss. And the cold cap works better with short hair. It was very uncomfortable, almost intolerable (minus six degrees), but I managed to stoically keep it on for more than 4 hours. I hope it works because I find the idea of losing my hair quite distressing. At the moment people cannot tell I am ill, but once hair starts falling out it will be very visible that I am going through treatment.
In case I do lose my hair, I have already several fun scarves that I will learn to match with my clothes.
I have to admit that I had fun cutting my hair. One positive thing about cancer was finding a couple of good haircuts that suit me well and are easy to manage.

Here I am looking funny with the cold cap on during my first chemo session.
Obviously the cold cap did not work for me as I lost all my hair during the second week after the 1st chemo.
This picture has been added to this post on the 11th of Dec. 2010