All dressed up... again!

Waiting...

Two weeks ago I went again to the hospital for the "breast surgery: the sequel", almost one and a half years after the first big surgery.
There's nothing nice about having surgery: I felt nervous and anxious. I was hungry and tired (hadn't eaten and hardly slept). I felt vulnerable and sad.
It all became very real when the surgeons (I had two this time) came in to make the markings on my skin, one made his marking in black, the other in green. After that, the same ritual starts: the anaesthetist comes to ask the usual questions, the phlebotomist draws some blood, the nurse makes sure I am well and gives me a fancy hospital gown, very white compression socks, anti-slip green socks (health and safety!), disposable panties (sexy!) and a non-matching robe. So pretty! Luckily S. thinks that even in a hospital gown I am still the prettiest girl ever (love is blind!).
It is the fourth time I have surgery in this hospital and I almost feel at home there. The room is nice, with two big windows, it is quiet and comfortable. There is a closed balcony with sofas where patients and guests can go to read and relax. The nurses and staff are just amazing, when they heard I was in the ward they came to say hello and wish me luck. They are really nice people and they treated me very well, as always.
I was then taken to the operating theatre where the anaesthetist and his assistant were waiting for me. The anaesthetist had some difficulty finding a suitable vein. My right arm cannot be used (to reduce the risk of lymphoedema) and my left arm is still recovering from the chemotherapy induced phlebitis. Against his will he ended up putting the catheter into a vein in my hand. Before I had time to count until five, I was asleep. I woke up from the surgery in pain and the first day was a bit rough but the surgery went well and I am doing fine now, recovering fast and without complications (I'll spare you the gory details).
I am at home, on sick leave for about three weeks. I can't do much so I read and watch movies with my mother. Not a bad life!
I try not to think much about what I went through, about how I look and how I will look like in the future. Emotionally I feel weaker than before, I feel tearful most of the time and I am always making a huge effort to stay positive, smile and enjoy life.